Saturday, January 25, 2020

A Well Placed Question

Well worn and used journals can be a reference library of sorts as I navigate life's ups and downs. Researching my own experiences to find God, His answers, His movement, and His faithfulness. This week I fanned through the pages of one of my many journals and found an entry from January 9th, 2020:

I find myself reminding myself that light shines in broken vessels to keep myself hoping, believing and putting one foot in front of the other. How does my continued brokenness bring You Glory?

That last line, the question, inquiring of the Lord how my seeming perpetual mess brings Him any kind of Glory. It was an honest asking and wanting to know and understand. Wanting to know that I am still going the right way. 

Although most days I’m confident of His love and my position in Him, there are days, like January 9th, that I struggle and wonder, how is my life making a difference in the Kingdom? How will anyone see you in this mess?

The answer came in the middle of the night, last night, as I awoke with terrible anxiety, my body locked up in pain. 

The whisper, “My Light still shines through those cracks.”

Just like that, my Daddy spoke to my heart to settle me. The anxiety didn’t go away and my body is still tight, but my heart is resting in Him.

I have this beautiful picture of a shattered pot with cracks everywhere and the sun hitting it just right that I see varying rays of sunlight shining through. That’s my life! As long as I am still putting myself out there allowing others to see the cracks, the brokenness, His light is shining through and that is where He is glorified.

He still shows up in broken places.

He still places His light in cracked pots.

And He is still making necessary repairs to make that pot whole again.

Do you journal? What kind of journal and I don’t mean spiral bound or hardbound? I mean is it a prayer journal, a question journal or an art journal? Is it a form of communication with the Father or yourself? I’m curious. As I look around my house and studio and see probably 100 journals all started with some form of communication - a gratitude list, a prayer, a sketch, scribble, etc. all to communicate my heart to the Father and understand His a little more.

My hope is that this will encourage you in your process, your state of brokenness, that He still sees you and shines through. I think through all of this He is encouraging me to let others see the light even in the various states of disrepair.

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